Mel: Omg, you are never going to believe what a teacher had to confiscate from one of our kids at recess on the FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL......
Jenny: What?! What?!
Mel: Handcuffs. Like real, metal ones.
Mel: At least they weren't the fuzzy kind.
Friday, August 31, 2012
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
On Swimming Records
Jenny: I did see that! "...Called it off due to storms and jellyfish..." Uhh yeah! It's the ocean! There are hurricanes and shit. Just ask a pirate.
Monday, August 20, 2012
Jenny and Mel Watch Merlin, Part 2
Jenny: So now in this next ep, Arthur kills a unicorn. Who kills a unicorn? Honestly? They are just pretty and mystical.
Mel: Haha seriously...leave it to a man to be like "ohhh lookit the pretty white horsey...I'M GONNA KILL IT!"
Jenny: Absolutely! Assholes
Mel: Plus, you know that whole legend about unicorns only appearing to virgins? Sooo now we know that about Merlin and Arthur lol...
Jenny: OMG! I didn't know that but I do now...seems obvious for Merlin but come now Arthur...someone's not even trying.
Mel: Haha seriously...leave it to a man to be like "ohhh lookit the pretty white horsey...I'M GONNA KILL IT!"
Jenny: Absolutely! Assholes
Mel: Plus, you know that whole legend about unicorns only appearing to virgins? Sooo now we know that about Merlin and Arthur lol...
Jenny: OMG! I didn't know that but I do now...seems obvious for Merlin but come now Arthur...someone's not even trying.
Sunday, August 19, 2012
Watching Merlin
Jenny: I wonder if this happened a lot in medieval times where dragon things just destroyed villages everyday.
Mel: Yeah, like a new person moves in next door, and they're like "yeahh, we had to move because a dragon burned down our last home." And you're like "verily, that sucks man. Our last home? Sat on and squished by a griffin." "Hate it when that happens."
Mel: Yeah, like a new person moves in next door, and they're like "yeahh, we had to move because a dragon burned down our last home." And you're like "verily, that sucks man. Our last home? Sat on and squished by a griffin." "Hate it when that happens."
Thursday, August 16, 2012
SHARK WEEK!
"I wish I knew I could be badass enough to be on the losing side of a shark attack and have it fuel my vengeance-seeking rage, becoming a one-armed Shark Hunter." -Mel
Jenny and Mel Take on River Monsters
If you don't like the Animal Planet show, River Monsters, you should probably just go ahead and skip this post.
Jenny: How many times do we have to say it...If you're playing in a South American or African sketchy ocean, you're just begging to get your leg ripped off.
Mel: Just keep all limbs out of the water, and then all you have to worry about is gators and lions and shit.
Jenny: Yeah. Normal stuff.
--
Mel: Okay, anything that makes your pole bend THAT much is not something you wanna be hauling to the surface.
--
Mel: Why is he standing right next to it IN THE WATER and not holding the tail he JUST said was poisonous and deadly?
Jenny: Obvious Jeremy has book smarts but not street smarts lol.
Mel: For real. But if he did, we wouldn't have anything to watch on Sundays at ten.
--
Mel: If I ever get attacked by something nasty, I hope I get to be one of those gruesome stories on this show at least...I feel like it might make the experience almost funny...like "AHHHHH! SHITTTT!! ...Wonder what Jeremy Wade is gonna say about this one?"
--
Mel: "...Drive to the brink of extinction"...Umm...good!!
Jenny: It's about time something is!!
Mel: Haha omg seriously! Why is he upset about it when not twenty seconds later they show clips of one hacking some unfortunate guy apart?
--
Mel: I don't know if you're watching River Monsters, but if you are...I just giggled when he said "penetrate." This show is on too late.
--
Jenny: Is it me or is there a lot more fish blood tonight than normal?
Mel: Ew, yeah....maybe things bleed more in Russia.
--
Jenny: "Something is bubbling up" uh yeah! The river turns into blood...read your Bible lmao. If I were the apocalypse I'd probably start in East Russia too.
--
Jenny: Why does he care so much about the fish? IT KILLS PEOPLE.
Mel: I know! That's why it kills me that he's a biologist...cause he spends all this time dragging these dangerous beasties out of the water, only to look at it for like eight seconds before being all "welp, better put it back in the water...boo boo endangered...boo boo ecosystem...boo." IT'S GONNA EAT SOMEONE NOW, JEREMY!
Jenny: Exactly what I thik ALL the time! When he was holding that little one, my mom was like 'aww...' I said, 'kill it!'
Mel: Do it now whie it's too small to MURDER YOU.
Jenny: How many times do we have to say it...If you're playing in a South American or African sketchy ocean, you're just begging to get your leg ripped off.
Mel: Just keep all limbs out of the water, and then all you have to worry about is gators and lions and shit.
Jenny: Yeah. Normal stuff.
--
Mel: Okay, anything that makes your pole bend THAT much is not something you wanna be hauling to the surface.
--
Mel: Why is he standing right next to it IN THE WATER and not holding the tail he JUST said was poisonous and deadly?
Jenny: Obvious Jeremy has book smarts but not street smarts lol.
Mel: For real. But if he did, we wouldn't have anything to watch on Sundays at ten.
--
Mel: If I ever get attacked by something nasty, I hope I get to be one of those gruesome stories on this show at least...I feel like it might make the experience almost funny...like "AHHHHH! SHITTTT!! ...Wonder what Jeremy Wade is gonna say about this one?"
--
Mel: "...Drive to the brink of extinction"...Umm...good!!
Jenny: It's about time something is!!
Mel: Haha omg seriously! Why is he upset about it when not twenty seconds later they show clips of one hacking some unfortunate guy apart?
--
Mel: I don't know if you're watching River Monsters, but if you are...I just giggled when he said "penetrate." This show is on too late.
--
Jenny: Is it me or is there a lot more fish blood tonight than normal?
Mel: Ew, yeah....maybe things bleed more in Russia.
--
Jenny: "Something is bubbling up" uh yeah! The river turns into blood...read your Bible lmao. If I were the apocalypse I'd probably start in East Russia too.
--
Jenny: Why does he care so much about the fish? IT KILLS PEOPLE.
Mel: I know! That's why it kills me that he's a biologist...cause he spends all this time dragging these dangerous beasties out of the water, only to look at it for like eight seconds before being all "welp, better put it back in the water...boo boo endangered...boo boo ecosystem...boo." IT'S GONNA EAT SOMEONE NOW, JEREMY!
Jenny: Exactly what I thik ALL the time! When he was holding that little one, my mom was like 'aww...' I said, 'kill it!'
Mel: Do it now whie it's too small to MURDER YOU.
So, Technically This Occurred Via Twitter...
Jenny: Reading outside...away from my computer and TV.
Mel: At this rate, we're gonna be little old ladies surrounded by towers of books...hunched over our futuristic, idk, holographic laptops, going, "I know I just bought six more 3D books but these space cats aren't going to pin themselves!"
Mel: At this rate, we're gonna be little old ladies surrounded by towers of books...hunched over our futuristic, idk, holographic laptops, going, "I know I just bought six more 3D books but these space cats aren't going to pin themselves!"
Jenny: I was just about to ask if you wanted to take a library trip with me today. I have so many to read and I always end up distracted by Pinterest sooo maybe I should give the ones I have a shot first.
Mel: Story. Of. My. Life. I just downloaded a crap ton of Kindle books since I got it, bought three new books at the Book Nook yesterday, and now just took two books out from the library...but what do I do in my free time? Spend hours on tumblr, Pinterest, Facebook, and Netflix.
Jenny: We are the same person...It's official.
Mel: Story. Of. My. Life. I just downloaded a crap ton of Kindle books since I got it, bought three new books at the Book Nook yesterday, and now just took two books out from the library...but what do I do in my free time? Spend hours on tumblr, Pinterest, Facebook, and Netflix.
Jenny: We are the same person...It's official.
The Olympics and Our Idol
Jenny: And now they are in a rain delay...I said "Who is going to get Kate her umbrella?" And Kelly goes: "Pippa lol."
Mel: Haha yes! I would so make use of my title if I were her: "Pippa, be a dear and fetch me my umbrella." "But, I--" "I'm sorry, WHICH one of us is a princess, hmm?"
Jenny: YES! "Ugh, I'm the future queen, PEASANT. Get me my umbrella and a diet soda while you're at it."
Mel: "GOD HELP YOU IF THERE'S TOO MUCH ICE."
Mel: Haha yes! I would so make use of my title if I were her: "Pippa, be a dear and fetch me my umbrella." "But, I--" "I'm sorry, WHICH one of us is a princess, hmm?"
Jenny: YES! "Ugh, I'm the future queen, PEASANT. Get me my umbrella and a diet soda while you're at it."
Mel: "GOD HELP YOU IF THERE'S TOO MUCH ICE."
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